In the early 70’s, one of the respected Shluchim on the East Coast married off his daughter, and also managed to purchase new properties and expand the reach of his school and activities.
The Shliach wrote to the Rebbe about his expansion plans and the Rebbe responded to him with the following:
“1) Since the school year is about to begin,
2) You are storming the world and people around you,
3) [and] specifically after the great success you have seen in [name of the city] (regarding the property, etc. etc.) which allows you to expand substantially the activities in your location,
[You] invest your energy in projects that can be done by others, and therefore other projects (which only you can do) are being ignored,
I am proposing the following plan – despite the worry about it’s success – if you will work together to the fullest extent, without temper, but rather with happiness and gladness of the heart:
I will recommend to your son-in-law and daughter […] that they should move to [name of the city] and take upon themselves the position.
But, for it to 1) succeed [and] 2) that it should not damage at all the Shalom Bayis (for the Shchina is present between man and woman), the following must be done:
Give him absolute and real autonomy in his work – i.e. that after you will discuss with him clearly and with great detail what his job entails, you will not get involved at all in his work (unless he asks for your involvement) – not you, not your wife and not your [other] daughter […].
– Just as you have offered a while back, without being asked to do so, to […] – his salary and the rest of his conditions – [you should offer to your son-in-law] at least the same as you have offered to the other person (although in my opinion a Lubavitcher is worth more than a Mussar’nik).
… All this should be done on a trial basis for one year, and afterwards – there shall be no complaints at all if one of the sides doesn’t want to continue, and it should be as if they never worked there.
But, I am sure that these conditions are followed by both the father-in-law and the son-in-law – your partnership will be very successful, and the institution will grow and expand more and more, and the merit of the founder of the institution will help each one of you.”
Together with this, the Rebbe also sent the following note to the son-in-law:
“1) Since the institution in [name of city] belongs to the [Frierdiker] Rebbe,
2) [And] it needs workers who are dedicated to the will of the [Frierdiker] Rebbe,
3) [And] now is an opportune time to expand it etc,
Since neither you nor your wife have found yet a job for the upcoming year, and the new school year is about begin, and the majority of the available jobs are not great – I recommend you consider seriously the idea […], but first discuss clearly:
1) What is your job, 2) [that] they don’t get involved in your job (unless you request their involvement), 3) a clear commitment to a salary, 4) Clearly it is only a one year trial, and afterwards it’s a new thing, 5) You will live in your own house (not in the house of your father-in-law, your wife’s father).
– the merit of the founder of the institution will help each one of you.”