Follow ChabadInfo & Never Miss an Update!

Follow us on Instagram Subscribe to our WhatsApp status and broadcast Follow us on Tiktok Follow us on Facebook Follow us on X Follow us on Google News Subscribe on YouTube

Hataras Nedarim Over the Phone

If a person undertakes self-imposed restrictions or obligations and they no longer wish to practice them, they must perform hataras nedarim. Hataras nedarim should be done in the presence of a beis din consisting of three people, at least one of whom knows what the vow in question is, as well as the halachos of how and when it’s permissible to annul vows, and the other two should be knowledgeable enough that if the halachos of hataras nedarim were explained to them they would understand.

Sometimes it’s difficult to assemble the three people needed to do hataras nedarim. In case it’s absolutely necessary—and only if there is no other option—hataras nedarim can be done by telephone in the following manner: Two people sit with the rav; the person who wishes to have his vow annulled calls the rav, and the rav does hataras nedarim together with the other two dayanim. It is much preferred to do it via Skype, or by similar means over the Internet, so that the three dayanim can see the person who is having his neder annulled. Halacha2go.com #317*

I took on a Hachlata, but now I wish I hadn’t. May I stop it?

If one undertook a minhag tov such as prishus (abstaining from a certain indulgence) or a chumra with the intention of adhering to it permanently, or if they did it three times—after which it becomes halachically binding—they would have to do hataras nedarim (have the vow nullified by a beis din) if they wish to stop doing it. This is because the new practice has acquired the properties of a vow.

However, if the practice was based on a mistaken assumption—such as the incorrect notion that one should stand during a certain part of the davening—then it’s deemed a minhag ta’us (a mistaken practice), and it may be discontinued without resorting to hataras nedarim. Halacha2go.com #547 – see also Halacha2go.com #51

What options does a woman or girl have to be released of her commitment?

If a married woman makes a neder placing a restriction upon herself, or she commits to a minhag tov —which is tantamount to making a neder—the halacha is that her husband can resort to hafaras nedarim by saying “Mufar lichi” (or something similar) three times. However, hafaras nedarim only works for vows involving devarim she’beino l’beinah (interpersonal matters affecting him) or inui nefesh (afflicting herself), and only if he had not previously approved of her neder. Moreover, it must take place b’yom sham’o (before sunset of the day that he hears about it).

When hafaras nedarim isn’t an option—because one or more of the above requirements haven’t been met—there are other means to cancel her neder. She can appear before a beis din of three, who will do hataras nedarim for her; in fact, her husband can represent her as her shliach since ishto k’gufo. However, the husband may only appear before the beis din once they’ve assembled, but he may not take part in assembling the beis din. He also can’t be one of the dayanim, since ishto k’gufo, and one may not be matir neder for oneself. In case he already approved of her neder, a Rav should be consulted about how to proceed with hataras nedarim through a beis din.

The father of a girl under the age of twelve and a half also has the power to void his daughter’s nedarim. If he wishes to permit her neder through hataras nedarim, he can’t be her shliach. However, he, along with her brothers or other male relatives, may form the beis din of three to be matir her neder, since kerovim are permitted to be matir nedarim. A single girl over the age of twelve and a half can only resort to a beis din of three, which may include relatives, to annul her nedarim. Halacha2go.com #524*

Should a Beis Din annul a neder made to quit smoking?

If someone in their struggle to quit smoking—or stop abusing drugs—made a neder to stop, but now wishes to have their neder annulled, should the beis din acquiesce?

The halacha is that a beis din should not be matir neder that was made to stop one from violating an issur. However, some poskim argue that if there’s a chance that the person will violate the issur—and leaving the neder in place poses an additional michshol (pitfall) for them, possibly resulting in transgressing both the issur and the neder—the neder should be annulled.

It can be countered that the last point applies only if the neder is regarding an issur d’rabanan , but not to an issur d’Oraisa. Smoking and drug abuse pose a sakanah (physical danger) and should therefore be treated even more severely than an issur d’Oraisa. For this reason, many poskim rule not to be matir neder, saying it’s preferable to keep the neder in place on the chance that it may serve as a deterrent, even if it might be breached. Halacha2go.com #559*

88