Written by Chana V.
Recently, I tried to reach a Mashpia for an important matter. I left a message and was hoping to hear from her. It’s not the first time that this Mashpia did not return my call, but because of the necessity to reach her specifically, (due to her having a connection to someone that could help me) I tried to call her anyway. No call was returned.
Now, let me be clear, I do not take more time than needed, (I happen to know what that feels like, because I’ve been taken advantage of, in this regard) I do try to be very careful with other people’s time. I also am not someone that was given “Mashpia Homework” from her that was not done, and I did not call Erev Shabbos, Yom Tov or a week or two before Pesach.
So I ask you; “Why wasn’t my call returned?” I know I’m not the only one with this experience, but how are we to fulfill the Rebbe’s Bakasha Nafshis or respect these women, if our calls aren’t returned by the people we think could help us? Let me just say, I totally understand why it may take a week or so in certain cases (like making a Simcha, traveling, etc,) to return a call, but I’m talking about not getting my call returned at all. Period.
You may ask why don’t you just call her again, or you may tell me as I’ve heard from a different Mashpia, that it’s the Mushpa’s job to catch (run after) the Mashpia, not the other way around.
So this is my thoughts on that; I am ready to be vulnerable, open up about my “personal matters” etc. to get advice, but do I also have to really run after her, especially since there were other times she didn’t call me back?
Where’s the respect, the dignity, the human decency? Is this what the Rebbe would want? No, she’s not the only person or Mashpia that hasn’t returned my call, even if I called them more than once, and as stated earlier, I know I’m not the only one this happens to. Can someone explain and enlighten me as to the reasoning of why someone would not return a call. I don’t get it!
Yes, I may have to call her again and again, but I really don’t want to and maybe it’s because if someone can’t respect me and give me the dignity every human being deserves, then maybe they should never be a Mashpia in the first place.