Beis Moshiach Magazine
Gut voch! L’chaim, l’chaim!
The reason I’m here tonight is because I was asked to speak. And why was I asked? I was asked because of a viral video that went out a couple of months ago. I spoke in Los Angeles for Yud Bais-Yud Gimmel Tammuz, on a topic, and in today’s day there are no secrets. Someone took a video with my permission, and before I knew it, it spread everywhere. From that video, I was asked to speak.
Let me give you a little bit of background, where I’m coming from. As was mentioned before, I don’t come from a Chabad background. I come from a Chassidishe background; I grew up in Boro Park. I was always a thinker, always searching.
For whatever reason, when I was 17 years old, by hashgacha elyona, learning in the Slabodka Yeshiva, I ended up going to Kfar Chabad for Shabbos on Yud Bais Tammuz, 5749. In Kfar Chabad I found – “es ahava nafshi- what my soul was searching and longing for.”
I heard R’ Mendel (he didn’t farbreng, but I was glued to him). I heard shiurim by R’ Zalman Gopin on a Maamar from the Rebbe, and it blew me away. I came back to Slabodka, and my soul was on fire!
I’m learning, and trying to grab as much Chassidus as I can – I can’t get enough; I learned with R’ Zalman Landa, with R’ Mendel Wechter, until…I got my badge of honor: they kicked me out of Slabodka.
So… I don’t have a “Yechi” pin, but I have my badge of honor! I was kicked out of Slabodka – for mesirus nefesh for Chassidus.
The time that I came to Lubavitch was Mem-Tes (5749). That time was the height of the Moshiach frenzy. I was swept into this feverish excitement about Moshiach. And we had Mem-Ches, Mem-Tes, and it only became more intense: Nun, Nun-Alef, Nun-Bais; and I was completely absorbed in this, and excited. I was waiting every moment for the hisgalus; there was no shadow of a doubt in my mind – it was so clear.
And you are going to ask a question: I had no exposure to Lubavitch. I went to all the Rebbes in the world, but even though I lived in Boro Park it never entered my mind to go to Crown Heights. So, if you’re totally new to Lubavitch, how do you have such a metamorphosis, such a transformation and you believe in such radical things?
So, I’ll tell you: Initially, when I was growing up, my Yiddishkait was very superficial. I didn’t really have a deep, inner appreciation of what Torah and mitzvos mean, what the purpose of creation is; and the hashkofos that I had, whether it was a Litvishe hashkafa – that we’re here to go to Olam HaBa, or, we’re here to reach shleimus and perfection, didn’t speak to me. On the contrary: there was something in me that rejected it very strongly.
And when I started learning Chassidus, suddenly it came alive: the Alter Rebbe opened up a whole world. I started learning Shaar HaYichud V’HaEmuna. I remember learning how everything in the world is being “nishaveh b’chol rega v’rega” – the Baal Shem Tov’s teaching that the Eibeshter is mehave b’chol rega v’rega. The words the Eibeshter spoke to create the heavens is creating the world right now!
I remember walking in the streets of B’nei Brak, and it filled me with such joy, because, more than philosophy, more than the intellect, Chassidus resonates. It resonates in the neshama; it speaks to your etzem. It fits, it goes in, it makes sense; the neshama is mekabel it. This was my experience.
Then, when I turn around, after suddenly Yiddishkait makes sense, there is life, there is infinite depth – the inyan of dira ba’tachtonim – the whole purpose is down in this world – gevald! Now I am niskarev to the Rebbe, whereas my initial attraction was to Chassidus – and I am observing the Rebbe, and learning Basi L’Gani, and I read that when the Rebbe was a little boy – as it says in the letter “when I went to cheider and even before this, the images of geula started forming in my mind.” And again, the Rebbe is saying that even before he starts going to cheider he’s already thinking about the redemption of the world. Now I and you have heard many stories about g’dolei Yisroel, tzaddikim, great men, who when they were very young you already saw in them certain great genius; they learned, they knew…
They say about the Alter Rebbe that when he was a little boy – I don’t remember exactly which age – (I didn’t look this up) maybe three, four years old, the Alter Rebbe says that it was already clear by him – he began to sense the idea – of “neshamos Ani osisi,” that there are two neshamos, the nefesh ha’bahamis and the nefesh HaElokis. This is not ordinary information, this is only a person who is destined to write the Tanya; the person who is here to bring truth in the world, this person feels this when he’s two years old. This is not just information; this is not knowledge. This is intuition. This is a deep intrinsic soul feeling.
So here I’m looking, and I see that the Rebbe writes a letter like this, at two years old, before he even knows how to process knowledge; this is intrinsic!
Then we read Basi L’Gani. And we read about how the Rebbe speaks about two times seven generations, the seven generations at the beginning, to bring the Sh’china down the first time, beginning with Avrohom Avinu and ending with Moshe Rabbeinu, and there is again seven generations right before Moshiach comes that have to bring the Sh’china down here on earth.
When you learn that Maamar, it becomes absolutely clear from the very beginning what the Rebbe is saying! The Rebbe is comparing himself, the seventh generation, to Moshe Rabbeinu, and Moshe Rabbeinu is the goel, and he’s the goel, and it’s the seventh generation; there’s no question, it’s so clear! And even for Lubavitchers in general, it took a while for us to catch on, even though it was so clear.
And then… you start looking at the years: first of all, the first ten years (I’m not the biggest historian), you get the sense, from the Sichos that you learn, that the Rebbe needed to create Chassidim. Even though we had seven generations of Chassidim, the Rebbe needed to create Chassidim on a whole different level! Chassidim baalei kabbalas ol that are not going to ask questions; Chassidim that are going to be soldiers! Chassidim that are going to do what he tells them to do! Obviously, if the Rebbe is going to conquer the entire world, you need to have people, you need to have a team. Who’s going to do it with you?
So for ten years the Rebbe is developing Chassidim.
At that time there is Shlichus already, and it starts growing.
At a certain point, it becomes a concept of a Bais Chabad. What is that? A Bais Chabad is an embassy, and it reaches all the corners of the earth, like today – a network of embassies across the entire world! Never in the history of the Jewish people was there such a network, such a body of people dedicated to the betterment of mankind and to the elevation of the world.
And then the Rebbe starts a whole series of mivtzaim, to reach every single Yid, to connect with a mitzvah, preparing the world for the geula. Unbelievable! And the Rebbe gives them names, for example, the Rebbe names one of the mivtzaim “Neshek” – neshek means weapons. It’s a strange thing to say, weapons… Since when does a Rebbe need weapons?!
Then the Rebbe comes and introduces Tzivos Hashem; an army! Indeed, an army of innocent little kinderlach, children, but still, this is an army! And do you think the Rebbe was doing a marketing campaign to get kids excited and he came up with the idea that if he calls them an army they will join? Do you think a Rebbe kids around? The Rebbe said ARMY!
And then… the tanks roll out. And I’m processing all this when I’m seventeen, eighteen, nineteen years old. There is a concept of Mitzvah Mobiles, but the Rebbe calls them “tanks,” and the people in the tanks he calls “Tankistin.”
I come from a Chassidishe world, and I’ve known a lot of Rebbes. I never heard, in the history of all Chassidishe Rebbeim, of a Rebbe with tanks, a Rebbe with weapons, a Rebbe with an army! Rebbes don’t have those! Rebbes have meshulochim (maybe) and mosdos. They don’t have these things!
So right away I think: who has an army? Who needs an army, who needs weapons, who needs tanks? THAT’S A KING!! It becomes clear that the Rebbe is a Melech!
You can look and see this throughout the entire nesius; it’s getting only stronger and stronger, and then it reaches “Ad Mosai,” and it gets stronger in Mem-Ches and Mem-Tes, Nun, Nun-Alef, Nun-Bais. Gevald! We merit to hear such inyanim nifloim – such expressions – the Rebbe says such unbelievable things! And-WOW, WOW, WOW! Of course, I was completely swept up in this passion and excitement.
But then something happens. We have Chof Zayin Adar – the first one, unexpected, and then Chof Zayin Adar happens again. And then we’re hit with Gimmel Tammuz.
I have to say this: the first Chof Zayin Adar and the second Chof Zayin Adar, when the Rebbe had the stroke, I was able to continue in my emuna, belief and attachment, because I was able to explain it and say ‘of course, Moshiach Tzidkeinu has to go through this, and there has to be haalomos and hesterim- concealment;’ I was able to explain it in my mind.
After Gimmel Tammuz, also, for a couple of months, I had no problem; it hurt, and it was painful, but on the other hand, yes, there is the nisgaleh vechozer veniskaseh… there’s Midrashim… And we’re waiting and we’re still waiting for the hisgalus every moment.
But then, as time passes, one year goes by, two years go by, three years go by, it started becoming very challenging for me, personally. It was very difficult, for two reasons: first of all, in my own mind things didn’t make sense, especially if you go among people, family and relatives, people start looking at you as if you are an absolute lunatic. The belief of Moshiach, even before Gimmel Tammuz, was pretty extreme, and Lubavitchers were known as meshugoim, but so crazy?? Calm down!
So, after two or three years, an interesting thing began to happen to me, and that is that there were two Reuven Wolfs. There was an inner me and an outer me. Deep inside, at the very core, and I know this clearly and all along; deep inside I knew “ki eineinu rou v’lo zor” – we saw it with our own eyes – we saw the Rebbe, we saw “Yechi,” we saw everything happening with our own eyes, it was clear, no shaila! That was my deeper self, my Simchas Torah self, after a couple of l’chaims.
I remember that I was once in 770 for Yom Kippur, and by N’ila we were screaming “Shma Yisroel Hashem Elokeinu, Hashem Echad.” I have no problem at that deep inner moment to identify my neshama’s belief at the inner core, the “zehu zeh,” this is who he is! And it was no problem; in my mind it was clear.
The problem is, there is an ordinary self; the regular self – the more logical, thinking, rational person. And here, I couldn’t make sense out of it. I was jealous when I would come to farbrengens and I would come to 770, and I saw people taking it b’pashtus, and living with it, but I couldn’t, because I couldn’t relate to it, and it hurt me.
And then, the whole subject started causing so much pain, so much inner turmoil, because it created such confusion, that what I basically did was took the entire thing, put it on a shelf and locked it; closed it off and let it gather dust.
That means that I didn’t want to learn the Sichos of Nun-Alef/Nun-Bais, not that I had anything particularly against it, but I couldn’t identify. It’s almost like something deep inside of me died. And it hurt me, but it was kind of on the back burner, stashed away, and life goes on and everyone does whatever they do.
This lasted until three, four years ago. Then something happened.
That was a time in Lubavitch when sadly, there were a lot of serious tragedies. There were many people, young people, Shluchim, who passed away. There was a women’s gathering in Los Angeles, a Kinus Hisorerus, after a Shlucha passed away, and I was asked to speak at that gathering. So I took a walk (before I talk, I like to think, and I like that the inyan should come to me. I don’t like to be controlled. So I walk and whatever will come to me from above, wherever my mind will go, is a sign that this is what I have to speak about).
I got up and I spoke, and this is what came to me: I was telling the people that generally, if you get cramps in your stomach, and it’s hurting, what do you do? There are all kinds of remedies and medicines and various things you can do to hopefully help your stomach.
But what happens if the person who got the stomachache is a woman who is pregnant and is almost holding by her due date, and suddenly she gets a powerful cramp. Obviously, it would be utterly insane to imagine this woman running to the pharmacy and looking for Pepto-Bismol or whatever thing to stop her stomachache. LADY, IT’S TIME TO GO TO THE HOSPITAL. IT’S TIME TO GIVE BIRTH!
So I said to the women, usually when these tzaros happen in Klal Yisroel, we have a tradition. People took upon themselves fasting, tz’daka; that’s all in the mindset that we’re in galus and we’re staying in galus; we have to ease the pain so that the Eibeshter should take away this extra bad g’zeira in galus. But now, we’re holding by the geula – it’s time to go have the baby.
I didn’t chas v’shalom want to legitimize the inyan that it’s chevlei Moshiach and there has to be pain and suffering; the Rebbe said we were “yotze” already. But on the other hand, the Rebbe did tell us that we have to look at everything from the perspective that Moshiach is about to happen. And therefore, I said, we must make sure that it’s time to go give birth! Let’s go to the hospital!
How do we make the baby be born, how do we make Moshiach happen? So – and I remembered, that the Rebbe told us clearly, in Parshas Tazria Metzora, Nun-Alef, that the way to bring Moshiach – derech ha’yeshara – is to learn seriously inyanei Geula and Moshiach.
I gave a fiery speech, telling the women that they have to learn inyanei Geula u’Moshiach. And women, b’z’chus nashim tzidkoniyos particularly, are so mekabel inyanim, especially inyanim of emuna, and there were women who came over to me right afterwards and said: we’re maskim all the way, but you should give the shiur, “The one who reads the letter should carry it out!”
Being that there was no choice, I had to commit to a new shiur. Once a week I started giving a shiur in inyanei Geula and Moshiach. I taught the shiur from the seifer “Yalkut Geula U’Moshiach al HaParsha” by Rabbi Dubov, and decided that I will start from B’Reishis, and go week by week, mamosh every story in the Torah, and find the nekudah of Moshiach in the story. Rabbi Dubov did a wonderful job, and finds so many inyanim; the shiurim were gevaldig. In the course of the seifer he also brings the Sichos of Nun-Alef and Nun- Bais, and it kind of forced me to learn them.
So I’m learning the Sichos, and an amazing thing happened: as I am learning and teaching it, which means I have to absorb it, then I have to verbalize and articulate it and explain it to other people, I suddenly began to become more and more comfortable with the notion of Moshiach. Imagine! But this is what the Rebbe told us: if you are going to learn it, the inyan is going to enter into you through Torah, and enter into your neshama. Not only that, I became so enthused with these concepts and ideas, that I started looking at the world around me, and I started noticing all the things that are going on in the world are mamosh crazy. And this is what the Rebbe says: if you will learn and open up your eyes, you will see in the world that everything is in Moshiach mode.
And then I’m looking at the last twenty-six years since the Rebbe spoke in Nun-Bais, and it becomes so clear that even though whatever happened and we have a he’elem vehester, a concealment, at the same time the world is advancing unbelievably towards Moshiach, and in all areas, whether in technology and everything else, it’s just unbelievable.
Just a couple of months ago, I came across a seifer that was given out at the Kinus HaShluchim last year, called Inyano Shel Moshiach by Rabbi Sholom Ber (Berele) Wolf, and I started to learn it. When I saw a seifer on Moshiach, being that I’m always looking for something, I got so excited that I couldn’t put it down for a week and a half! I learned the seifer from cover to cover, and it blew me away – why? He took all the Sichos of the Rebbe regarding Moshiach, and systematized them in such a clear way and it’s written in a manner that is niskabel for people to receive it and understand, appreciate and internalize it. And I started reading it again, and not only that, I started giving shiurim based on the seifer. I was so blown – it is very special!
This is what happened: as my excitement about Moshiach grew and with the clarity and understanding that comes from learning the Sichos, and we’re learning them and seeing how this is our only Shlichus, I began questioning myself, am I fulfilling my Shlichus the way I’m supposed to?
And not only that; it started causing me a lot of pain when I see devoted Shluchim across the entire world, and I see so many Chassidim-Shluchim, Shluchim of mesirus nefesh, devoted to Shlichus, but so many of them are stuck in the place where I was stuck. Not, chas v’shalom if, you would go deep and sit by a farbrengen and say a lot of l’chaims and get to the nekudah atzmis, the inner yechida sh’b’nefesh, the emuna would surface without a doubt. But because there is a lack of communication between the mind and the understanding and the deep, rich powerful nekudas haYahadus that is inside, there is some kind of a disconnect, people became so afraid, because it causes such pain, such confusion, and Shluchim across the world started becoming more and more removed from the inyan, to the point that the word irritates, the word scares, it’s almost like a taboo word that you don’t mention, for it creates a certain discomfort.
This started causing me so much pain and it bothered me: friends, don’t we get what’s happening over here? Look what’s happening! The Rebbe took us mamosh, mamosh, mamosh to the threshold, mamosh to the place, and he said: chevra, I need you! I need you to help me walk across this threshold; we’re going to do this together!
And at that moment, chas v’shalom, the thought that the Army, the Rebbe’s devoted people are deserting the mission. It scared me; it hurts me. And I’m saying: chevra, we must do something! People need to come back to what the Rebbe gave to us.
I know that what I’m saying is obvious to everyone over here, but because of the channels that are available today, I hope that my words will reach many others, many other people, many other Shluchim around the world that are struggling. I am calling out and saying as follows:
Let’s not forget from Tov Shin Yud Alef until the Chof years – learn all the Sichos from Cheilek Alef, Bais, Gimmel, Daled. What’s the foundation of all those Sichos? The foundation is kabbalas ol, that you do because you’re told to do, whether you understand or don’t understand. To chas v’shalom think that because I don’t understand so I’m just going to ignore two years of Sichos, I’m going to stash them away, lock them up and close myself because I don’t understand. It’s very scary.
Then, the other thought that occurred to me, which I think is very important: anybody that has a tiny bit of a whiff of Chassidus, knows that the roots of the connection of a Yid with the Eibeshter, of a Yid with Elokus, is not in Bina, as the Alter Rebbe explains. It’s not in your seichel, but it’s in Chochma. Chochma is the nekudas habittul which transcends logic, because you are connecting to Ohr Ein Sof; you are connecting to an infinite being that infinitely transcends seichel. There’s no thought that can grasp Him, and therefore the only inyan that can connect to the Eibeshter is the bittul of Yechida she’b’nefesh, chochma sh’b’nefesh, the ko’ach ma. That’s where a Yid is a Yid!
The Alter Rebbe teaches us in Tanya that the Jewishness of a Jew is dependent on the “l’maalah mi’taam v’daas,” on the craziness. And here is a very important inyan: the Alter Rebbe says that “b’heimos hoyisi eemoch’ (T’hillim 73, 22) – like an animal was I with You.” The way to be with the Eibeshter is not by being a chochom, but “beheimos” – I am with you because I am an animal.
What does it mean in practical terms? When you are told by a Rebbe, you are told clear osiyos… there is no question; anybody that sits and learns the Sichos will see clearly that we were given exact instructions what our avoda is and so on and so forth. It is so clear, but if we can’t relate to it because our minds can’t fathom it because we have questions because we are looking at what we call “facts on the ground,” then we have ha’alomos v’hesterim.
There are so many Sichos where the Rebbe tells us that the nisayon right before Moshiach comes is not to be embarrassed by those who make fun. I want to ask my dear fellow Shluchim who flew in from across the world a simple question: in today’s day, who makes fun of a Chabad House?! Who laughs at you for doing mivtzaim? Who laughs at you? On the contrary, everybody, people from all over are happy! Everybody’s happy that there’s a mikveh, there’s kosher food, everybody recognizes Lubavitch’s mesirus nefesh; everybody cherishes it. The whole world is clapping bravo, bravo for Lubavitch!
The one thing that people do laugh at sometimes… is … oh, you believe in etc. Are you one of those guys? This is the mockery that the Rebbe spoke of as the nisayon. A person likes his self-respect, and is uncomfortable with the idea that he should be laughed at.
Before every revelation, there’s always a concealment, always a challenge. So doesn’t it make sense that before the greatest revelation of all time, and nothing parallels Moshiach, nothing, nothing, nothing will ever parallel the coming of Moshiach. This is the ultimate, ultimate, ultimate gilui.
Doesn’t it makes sense in our minds that before that there will be a concealment, and a very tough concealment, and it will be hard. The holy Ruzhiner Rebbe said that right before Moshiach comes, to hold on to the emuna is going to be like hanging from a rope; you’re holding on to a rope, literally hanging from the rope and holding on. But right before Moshiach, they’re going to take the rope and shake it very strongly, and people are going to fly. You have to hold on with actual mesirus nefesh.
Who is the Ruzhiner talking about? Such a big challenge to emuna? It’s talking about believing in Moshiach, about holding on. We’re holding by this last threshold, and there are powerful storm winds blowing and blowing, and we have to just push forward and get through it.
But, here is the inyan: when you learn the Sichos and you learn the Maamarim, and you learn inyanei Geula and Moshiach, all that klipa dissipates; all that confusion just disappears, and it becomes so clear, so lebedik, so real.
Someone will say: Wolf, what makes you an authority on Lubavitch to tell Chassidim what to do? I am not. I am telling you right now that I am really not a big Mashpia and a big Rov – I don’t have to tell you – and people could say a guy with a shtraimel is going to tell me what to do? I’m a Shliach for fifty years already!
And you know what? Even if I’m not a Lubavitcher – I don’t have a Lubavitcher mother. Let’s say I’m not! Let me ask you, since when does Lubavitch have the only rights on Moshiach? Meaning to say, is Moshiach only for Lubavitch? Moshiach is for the entire world!
What does it mean that Moshiach is for the entire world? This is the purpose of creation from when the Eibeshter created the world, from the very beginning. For them there was “Lech lecha me’artzecha,” there were ten nisyonos, there was Akeidas Yitzchok, there was Mattan Torah, there was galus Mitzrayim with Pharaoh bathing in the blood of Jewish children, there were six million Jews who just recently went into the flames al kiddush Hashem, there was an Inquisition, pogroms, etc. There was suffering, suffering; we Jews have shed oceans of tears, rivers of blood, for what? So that we should come to this moment.
And the Rebbe is the one who has the responsibility to bring Moshiach, and the Rebbe said to the Shluchim that it’s your job to do it; don’t I have the right to call out to Shluchim and say: at this moment, chas v’shalom should we abandon our Shlichus because it doesn’t make any sense, I can’t fit it in my mind, and I’m so terrified to open up the Sichos and learn them and allow the emuna I already have to come out?
It’s frightening; it scares us, but that’s the question. We’re not in the times that Moshiach is a nice thing! THIS IS IT!! This is what it was all about from the very beginning. For us to ignore it is a problem.
So, therefore, just to conclude: the reason why I was able to absorb and have had, to a certain degree, a transformation for myself , was because I was able to pick up a seifer that took all the inyanim , what we call Oros d’Tohu, and explained them b’keilim d’Tikkun. In a manner that is gentle, not aggressive, not in your face; you can sense that there is no agenda, even though there is “Yechi” on the cover, but it is a very clean and clear, easy read. And you can connect to it, and it explains it, and it makes sense.
Hearing just a slogan didn’t work for me. Not that I’m saying, chas v’shalom, that it’s a problem; it just didn’t work.
What I am asking and saying is: today is Rosh Chodesh Kislev. It is easy, chas v’shalom, for us to reach out and blame this one and that one, but bottom line, 26 years or 23 years after Gimmel Tammuz and he still hasn’t come!
And, therefore, the cheshbon ha’nefesh must be for us: Are we creating enough keilim of tikkun? Are we articulating it in a manner that people can understand? In the Sichos and Maamarim, whenever the Rebbe talks about the Ohr habli-g’vul having to come into the keilim, the Rebbe doesn’t only blame the keilim for being rigid and strong and not accepting the Ohr. The Rebbe blames the Ohr too. The Ohr, too, is being too aggressive. The Ohr doesn’t want to consider that there’s a keili. Because the Ohr is so close to the etzem, it wants to say this is the way it is and I don’t want to diminish the inyan.
Friends, it’s important for us as well; we can’t do it on our own. We need Shluchim from the entire world. We can’t continue in this state. I am not a party man; I don’t belong here, I don’t belong there. This is all foolishness to me. It’s a simple inyan. There’s a Rebbe, Moshiach has to come: it has to happen right now, and we have to stop being petty. All of us have to grow up and say: Yidden, we must be active, enough is enough, we need to make it happen! And on both ends!
We must join together. There are people across the world who have such abilities to take and explain and bring things down.
I want to give a practical suggestion that we can do: some time over the next few months, Shluchim should get together from across the spectrum and again, it can’t be with any sense of “my way or the highway.” It has to be with an achdus and a desire for the inner kavana.
And what do we want? We want to sit together, we want to learn the Sichos, but we also want that every Shliach who has the ability to be able to take the inyanim from the b’li g’vul, and explain it in a way that we can understand, so that we can empower Shluchim… I know it’s been done, but it can be done so much better and so much stronger. There are people, geniuses, people from the world of tikkun, Tikkun sh’b’Tikkun. These are people who have abilities; they have such clarity.
If we could all sit together and say: friends, enough is enough…
We are going to sit together and we’re not watering down the inyan. The inyan is the inyan as is, and as is, we are going to bring it into keilim d’Tikkun, in a format that people can learn and understand. We were given a job, and if we were given the job, we could do it, and we will do it, and we will get this inyan – the hisgalus – done. The hisgalus of Moshiach, and may it happen, now mamosh!
I know perhaps that on some level I am standing here and speaking and it is not in accordance with everyone’s rules and regulations, but at this time all I can remember is what Mordechai said to Esther: “If you will be silent at this time, salvation will come from somewhere else.” This is not a time for quiet, but I hear what Esther answers: “and so will I go in unto the king and if I perish, I perish.”
What is pertinent is one inyan: “and so I will go in unto the King,” we are all coming today for Melech HaMoshiach, and we should merit the hisgalus, NOW!